WOULD-BE GOVERNOR PROMISES TO LIFT OHIO, CAN'T LIFT A FOURTH-GRADER
Vivek Ramaswamy, who hopes to carry the state of Ohio, attempted to hoist a 10-year-old onto the stage at a Trump rally and needed a second go when the lad nearly slipped. (The kid was fine and is the only person in this story who did nothing wrong.) Commentators called it 'embarrassing' and 'Absolutely brutal'. Meanwhile, the headliner told the crowd he knows more than 'anybody anywhere in the world', presumably including how to lift children.
THE BORING BIT: WHAT THE REAL REPORT SAYS
At a Trump rally, Ohio governor candidate Vivek Ramaswamy tried to lift a 10-year-old boy onto the stage; the boy nearly fell and he had to try again; commentators called it 'embarrassing' and 'Absolutely brutal'. At the same rally Trump said he knows more than 'anybody anywhere in the world'.
Our short summary of the original – read the full report for context. Everything above it is satire.
REAL STORY indy100 · 4 Oct 2026: “Vivek Ramaswamy struggles to lift kid in ‘embarrassing’ and ‘brutal’ rally blunder”
Gaffe-o-Meter: Vivek Ramaswamy · Outfit: MAGA