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Monday 2 November 2026FREE (you get what you pay for)Est. 2026, sadly
Nigel Farage and Jordan Bardella shook on a pact over migrant returns, only for French media to wonder whether Bardella had been duped – and whether the French translation said what Farage thought it said. France's Europe minister accused Bardella of 'submission', Marine Le Pen declined to comment until a time of her choosing, and Reform insists it was all agreed. Entente cordiale, lost in Google Translate.
A leaked trove of 420,000-odd emails shows Germany's AfD going to great lengths to court Trump and his Maga mates – including agonising over an obsequious 2016 congratulatory telegram wishing that his 'hopes as a person be fulfilled'. Trump has since repaid the love with a Truth Social post ending 'MGGA!!!'. Nothing says 'fiercely independent nation' quite like a grovelling greetings card to Washington.
Restore Britain speakers had planned a trip to a 'remigration' conference near Paris, only for France to ban the whole thing. Restore's Charlie Downes called it a 'Despicable heavy-handed approach to try and shut us down', a passionate defence of everyone's right to stroll into another country and lecture its people about who should be allowed in. Spokespeople for irony say they have never been so busy.
Flávio Bolsonaro has lost Brazil's presidential election to Lula by 51.79% to 48.21% – some 4.4 million votes – and, keeping it in the family, refused to concede and asked for the result to be annulled. Lula called it 'a defeat for denialism', which is going to be a tough one to deny. A request for best-of-three presumably follows.
After 16 years, Hungarian voters handed Viktor Orbán a landslide defeat – Péter Magyar's Tisza party took 138 of 199 seats – and even Orbán called it 'painful but clear'. Not everyone took it so well: Dutch hard-right leader Geert Wilders posted that 'Orbán was the only leader with balls in the EU', calling it 'A sad day'. The voters of Hungary appear to have checked, and found the plural optimistic.